Archive for April, 2026

A bit more time

April 26, 2026

If we had

a bit more time,

what could I do?

what would I say?

Would I try to give you a warning?

You would not heed it,

would only resent it,

would tell your siblings and your kids,

“Mom is trying to stop me

from doing what I love,”

“She always worries, about everything”

“I love what I’m doing”

“I’ve learned a lot”

“I’m always careful”

“I’m trying my best”

There is nothing I could do

to make this better,

and yet, all that I want,

more than anything,

is just a bit more time

with you.

cfblack 4-26-26

your things, Part Two

April 25, 2026

Today I opened the large trash bags

from the Upson County Sheriff Dept.

that held your belongings from the day you died.

I touched the parachute straps that held your body,

stained by Georgia red clay and dust,

and, I think, your own blood.

It’s hard to tell because it’s been 10 months,

so red turns to brown and tan,

mixes with dirt ground into the strap,

but the stains are there,

from where you landed, after your freefall

onto the “teeny tiny drop zone” at Skydive Atlanta.

Gently, I touched them, and felt close to you,

your heart beating under those straps,

your joy at flying at 12,000 feet,

joining other divers, doing flips,

your happiness when in the clouds,

seeing the curve of the Earth;

and I cussed out the little white parachute reserve,

so small it looked like a wedding veil,

that didn’t bother to open for you,

that failed you on that day,

and I pulled out your bright blue, perfect helmet,

that wasn’t cracked, didn’t have a flaw,

and I held it to myself, and cried.

Pictures of your dogs flew with you

their faces on the side,

a nine-pointed star decoration,

and a sign that said, ‘TRYING MY BEST!”

I am a person who wants to know it all,

wants to see and touch your things,

kneel at your gravesite,

call out to God in prayer!

feel it all deeply inside, within,

in order to then …………let go,

Fly, fly, my oldest child!

Fly through all the worlds of God,

Walk and talk with ‘Abdu’l-Baha,

fly throughout the universe,

We will do things in your name,

Hold your memory to our hearts,

Paint because you wanted me to,

Do things for you, for you, for you.

๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™

cfblack, 4-25-26

your things, Part One

April 25, 2026

They handed us your things

in trash bags.

The Deputy Sheriff of Upson County Georgia said,

FAA was done with them,

we could have them now.

I don’t know what I expected,

but it wasn’t trash bags,

maybe a box,

or parachutes torn, even dirty, but neatly folded,

out of respect for you,

and the magnitude, of our loss.

We set the bags in the back of the car,

went to your gravesite, said prayers.

It was sunny and hot,

there were new graves beside you,

and many of them had died young.

The painted rocks we left for you

sat around your headstone,

their colors and messages friendly and bright,

and the bluebird spinning, in the breeze,

It was lovely to be there, and feel your presence

near us once again.

Another 4 hours and we were

home in South Carolina,

we caught a bit of the NFL draft,

I did some grading,

Al went to bed.

Tomorrow when the air is fresh and clear,

I will go through what is in the bags.

It was too much for us to do, tonight.

I treasure the memory of your laughter.

4-24-26

“Know thyself, and know what leads to loftiness or abasement.”

April 4, 2026

I was a child

who spent time by herself

playing, thinking, creating,

drawing cards, writing poems for family,

arranging my dolls

pretending

sitting in the driveway picking out pretty rocks

riding my bike through the neighborhood

climbing trees,

exploring National Parks

surrounded by family

and just being loved.

It was later in life that I had to learn

to stand up with courage through hard times,

find my strengths, survive trauma,

loss, adversity, disappointment,

learn how to feel my way through the dark,

take steps while blindfolded,

feel my way along the wall

lean on my faith through it all,

I always told God, “Don’t take a child from me,

because I will not survive that loss.”

But He did.

And here I am, surviving.

I think I have a heart โค๏ธ

more tender than most,

perhaps a faith stronger than most,

perhaps I am more nieve than most,

but I have learned, felt, experienced

more. loss. than. most.

We are not here to fly through this life without pain,

We are here to learn how strong we are

to spread caring, love, help others,

no matter what comes our way.

There is always something you can do,

Reach out to a friend, Learn something new.

cfblack, 4-4-26

O SON OF MAN! My calamity is My providence, outwardly it is fire and vengeance, but inwardly it is light and mercy. Hasten thereunto that thou mayest become an eternal light and an immortal spirit. This is My command unto thee, do thou observe it.

Bahรกโ€™uโ€™llรกh

Artemus II mission

April 1, 2026

Before we send human beings
to fly around the moon,
travel into deep space,
test the ship’s navigation systems
with 4 live humans on board,
“pave the way for lunar habitation
and people exploring the resources of Mars”,
how about we put money into
saving THIS stunningly beautiful planet
with the thin layer of ozone that supports
ALL LIFE?
how about we stop dumping plastic into the oceans,
stop destroying the life-sustaining rainforest,
put an end to poaching and senseless killing of ourselves?
That seems more important to me.
cfblack, 4-1-26