I’m thinking of writing something about “things I’ve learned” by age 57. It would go something like this:
1. Nothing in life really surprises me anymore. Just about anything can happen, at any time. The lesson in this is to never take life for granted, to appreciate each day, and to take life as it comes. What matters is your response to those inevitable things that happen to you and those you love.
2. Bad things happen to good people. All the time, every day. I do believe in karma, but it may not be resolved in this world, and it only goes so far. You could do nice things for people all your life long, & still be treated unfairly. Even so, you should do nice things for people. It makes a difference in their lives. And God knows all.
3. Live your life in honesty and always do your best. Some people will always think you are not as honest as you are, because they are dishonest themselves and will treat you with suspicion. Others will think you are trying to prove you are better than they are. It doesn’t matter what they think. Do your best and move forward.
4. When you live honestly and sincerely, the truth often comes out eventually. People who treated you badly in the past show up years later, and apologize. This has happened to my husband and I many times. We have been through some pretty hard times and have been severely wronged, many times. The truth often comes out. See no.1.
5. Personal integrity matters. Over many years’ time, your integrity is the thing that people remember. It has to be consistent, and you do become known for it.
6. Health matters. The older you get, the more you have to be willing to fight for it. Nature is not kind, and once you go past a certain age, it’s a battle that is impossible to WIN. All you can do is fight it off for as long as possible. Focus on health, because of no.7.
7. Beauty fades. It just does. There isn’t a whole lot you can do about it. See no.6.
8. Your life partner and lover is your one and only true friend. As you get older, the friend part becomes more and more important than the lover part.
9. Never, ever take any relationship for granted. Every love relationship, be it friend, partner, or parent/child, needs CONSTANT work. Work at communicating, and listening. Never take their caring for granted. Be willing to give them the time they need. Do things together, reconnect. Be open and honest about how you feel. Let the little things go.
10. Spend time with your kids when they are little. As they get older, they will then want to spend time with you. Nothing else matters more in life, not one thing. Time is your greatest gift. Trying to explain why you had to be somewhere else is NEVER a substitute for just BEING THERE when they needed you.
11. Age 14-15 does pass. By the time they hit 21-22, you are once again their friend.
12. Grandkids are the best thing in the world. Visit them often.
13. Some people will hate you, despise you or just plain not like you. There is nothing you can do about this either. Know yourself and develop your best intuitive talents. Your personality will clash with some other types and it has nothing to do with anything you did wrong. Try to see what you can learn from them. Don’t expect them to like you.
14. You will fail at some things. You will mess up. We’re all human.