I watched a drone video of Pittsburgh
sent by my daughter-in-law,
It shows a city set in the mountains,
No matter where you go in Pittsburgh,
you’re going to walk either UP, OR, DOWN,
There is no in between.
And then I saw it, the “U.S. Steel Tower”,
“841 feet tall”,
“Pittsburgh’s tallest skyscaper,”
— and I thought, “That’s how far you fell.”
I am one who wants to KNOW,
I want to KNOW what happened,
If I ever have cancer, I want to KNOW,
If I am dying, don’t hide it from me,
I think from the time my father died,
if I think it through, and know the worst,
then anything else is up from there.
I have tried to FIND a building
as high as you were,
when you pulled your reserve,
how long did you have in freefall?
did you even have time to know?
These are the things I think about,
but, the most important message IS,
I know you fell into the arms of God,
I know you never suffered,
I know your spirit is close,
and this is where my thoughts should be.
Your message to me, after your passing,
was always, “Mom, be happy for me!
Be happy, I am HAPPY, I am where I should be!
Make others happy — Be happy for me.”
cfblack, 3-11-26
Doctor Grandma 
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